LeighMo's bit of heaven (or hell)

First things first. The hooptie died. That 1986 chevy celebrity, for which $500 was paid, ran out of gas last night and despite some $20 worth added (generously donated by some righteous peeps in Tacoma), could not find its get up and go.

I have no wheels at my disposal; luckily, it is sunny here most days (for now, at least) and the bus terminal is about half a mile away. I am not fully trapped, as long as the sunshiny holds out.

In other earth shatteringly boring news, I have a wayward ingrown toe nail that just won't give up. All spring, I was filing, buffing, pumicing, and lotioning so I would have uber cute, presentable toes; I go to do my first flip flop polish job, and thar she blows. A week later, she's still causing agony and, I fear, turning infected.

Oh, the things we do for beauty.

Moving on to the heartbreaking, I don't think I am going to be able to procure the necessary fundage to fly to MI to partake in my daughter's 7th birthday. Unless I get a mad number of jobs in the next few weeks, it simply isn't going to happen. She is a strong child, able to feel the upset and move past it rather quickly, but what has been getting her through the missing me is the possibility that I would come see her on her birthday.

She told me the other day when she sees airplanes, she cries a little because she knows I am not on it. Her teddy bear (one that the ex gave me when we were in high school) is now called 'mommy' so she can snuggle with it every night.

I asked her Dad if she could come live with me; he said no, he doesn't want them separated. My kids have all become very close over the last couple of years, and I can see that point of view; however, I think a lot of it is selfishness on his part, but I suppose one could say I was selfish for coming out here to begin with. The boys I think are handling me being away okay; a lot better than they handled not being with their Dad more, that is for sure. But Liv....I hear it in her voice, even though she's trying to cover it up. She misses me, and even though she has two brothers, two almost step sisters, one almost step brother, and her, she still wants to see me.

It breaks my heart, and there is no way I am moving back to Michigan. Selfish or not, there really is no point in both parents being unemployed with nothing for which to hope or work on the horizon. I am happy here, I love the area and the opportunities here; in some ways I feel more at home than I ever have before.

As for the fourth, I'm hoping to have a kickin weekend, full of relaxing, enjoyment of those in my midst, and seeing some killer fireworks over Commencement Bay (part of Puget Sound.) Hope you all have a safe and happy Weekend!